My love for you sank to the bottom of the ocean..

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Photo of the Day

Lost in love..

Wishlist

Here are the items!
~~1) Itouch~~
~~2) Skull Candy~~
3) Fred perry button shirt
~~4) Watch~~
5) Gucci wallet
~~6) Crumpler sling bag~~
7) Skaters Cap
8) Digital Camera
~~9) Clothes~~
~~10)White shoes~~
11)Accessories (tie, bowtie, brouch, vest etc..)

Written @ 6:53 AM

Leaving GV soon.. real soon.. till last Fri, i never knew tat GV can b so fun, ppl can b so nice.. ..

Grp bookin frm AIA n NOKIA tat day wen all managers shifted out frm their comfortable seats in manager's room n help out in candy bar.. i wondered y but ah ma oways landed up beside mi, helpin mi to fill up those necessary drinks.. i luv her most among all managers, she's like an angle, a light tat shines across n thru all darkness.. the onli tin tat hinders mi frm leavin, she will b the reason.. ..

All these while, i wana thx Wind, Jie ping, LiLi, Yati, Eugene, Ze ju, etc.. .. some names i may not mention, but u guys r equilvilant impt to mi.. u guys r the greatest pal tat one wld yearn for..

Yong xin, u're not the onli emo one ok.. so m i.. lolx~ so anitin we can share wif one another, i tink do click beri well.. i enjoyed workin wif u.. u're super hardworkin n ur jokes n suanin oways brighten up my bluey day.. lets go for supper some day again.. i miss all the time spent together wif u guys..

Ze ju, my fei wen nan you.. haha.. so long nv see u le, kinda miss u a little.. come back work quickly.. hope b4 i leave, i'm able to work same shift wif u.. our mo qi, tats all i can rem.. thx for entertainin mi all these while..

Jie ping, my foreva listener.. luv sharin wif him.. xcept for tat gal BESIDE him tat stop us frm tokin.. *Sianz* k.. aft all, we're jus FRENZ.. ..

Lots of tins happened dis wk.. pros n cons.. gd n bad.. hw m i suppose to look at it.. ..? all up to mi to decide.. .. ..

As i was servin n servin, a came across a bunch of ang mos.. jus wen one of dem said aloud 'hey! u've got a nice smile! u're so smiley!' well.. thou wat he said was plesant to enter my ears, but i wasnt even payin attention, neither did i care much abt him.. jus wen he asked 'do u nid a job?' i looked at my own uniform, stare at him, look back at my uniform, n stare at him again, replied 'sir.. i've oreli got one..' n tinkin tat he's a nuts.. he responded n said 'oh.. ok.. sure..' n left a pcs of paper on my counter.. well, customers oways leave those used tissues, flyers n wateva rubbish on our counter, so i did not gif a 2nd look on tat pcs of paper but concentrade on clearin my queue.. aft finish clearin the queue, i wanted to clean my counter wen i came lookin at the paper.. i was shocked.. it wasnt jus a pcs of waste paper as i tot.. it was a name card.. n he was actuali the General Manager of sentosa.. haha.. it was such a 'dream on' encounter.. so dramatic, yet it was true.. ..

nw havin fellowship over at bro's place.. n tat goes without sayin, i'm usin bro's lappy.. dey're playin monopoly while here i m, surfin the net n blog.. lolx~ i'm so bu he qun.. so self isolated.. haha.. yup.. i m.. at times, we nid some space to do our reflection, tinkin n soul searchin..yes.. as for mi, i oways nid those time.. ..

some may tink tat i've changed.. erm.. mayb? i haf no idea even.. onli realised tat i've change my attitude towards some ppl n some things.. certain ppl don worth us to b nice to n certain tins don nid us to throw our attention on it either.. .. i'm not cold, onli lazy to tok.. i'm not anti social, onli feel tat i nid some time for my own.. i'm still mi.. for tats the onli fact tat had remain unchanged..

r the rest easy satisfied? m did i ask for too much n too particular on tins in life.. ..? there r alot of tins which i cannot condone, yet others can jus blink their eyes thru.. m i takin tins too hard or r dey takin tins too easy.. ..?

as time passes, clock ticks, everitin ard us r changin.. i tend to feel so lost.. hu's still ard..? or shld i ask.. .. wat still remains the same.. ..? thus, we move n change accordingly to evolve ard the world.. ..

A Pure Heart
'A pure heart
that's what i long for
a heart that follows hard
after Thee x2

A heart that hides your word
so that sin will not come in
A heart that's undivided
but one you rule and reign
A heart that beats compassion
that pleases you my Lord
Sweet aroma of worship
that rises to your throne'

heard dis song so many times before.. yet i wonder y isit i had a diff feelin wen it was bein played durin svc ytd..the song din flow into my ear alone, but it went straight into my heart.. i den felt the pain, the struggle.. ..

wana thx cy for visitin mi at my work place.. not jus did she visitg mi, but as n wen she wana da bao food, she'll gif mi a call or msg to check if i wan some too.. so nice of her.. thx gal!

i've been workin n workin n workin.. i'm feelin a little shrag n tired oreli.. .. reli.. i'm worn out.. .. perhaps it time for mi to take some rest.. .. ..

Written @ 5:05 AM

Met cy up for dinner on monday.. lolx~ had thai xpress for our meal.. told her before even we went in tat the tom yum inside is white colour one.. n wen the dishes r bein served, she said 'eh!!! hw cum the tom yum white colour de!!!' =.=" haha~ so nice of her makin her way all the way down to kovan to meet me.. waa.. aft eatin, we bought mai ya tang to eat!

i look forceful isnt it? haas~

Met bro, yanglin n mingwei for fellowship on wed.. Headed to jurong east to repair lin's laptop.. man.. even hikin oso not so XIONG ar.. we're like walkin till legs numb lor.. finally aft ard 40 mins of struggle.. WE FOUND ACER BUILDIN!!! wee!!! *clap clap*! aplaus to ourselves!!!

Ytd workin was a sucky xperience for me.. those ppl i work wif all i don like.. summore mike MC again.. oways MC one.. left 3 of us doin EOS.. i clear one cinema aft another.. den Jane still got time fold trash bags.. i clear C4 alone leh!!! not fair!!! which idiot plan one sia!!! Lousy planner!!! ytd was reli a bz day.. we haf alot of grp bookins.. i almost died there.. ..

Haiz.. try sayin sumtin wrong n cause ur frenz to b demoted.. u'll regred thruout ur entire life.. .. but bro says 'iron sharpen iron'.. .. tats all he says.. .. haiz.. *guilty*.. ..

Written @ 5:49 AM

tats the 'long long' tat i wan.. its a merchandise frm 'Legend of the sea'..

Liang n i..

Sandy n i.. *cute!*

i tink my dimples r like more obvious den sandy's one.. but tats not the fact in reality.. lolx~

i'm learnin drivin soon.. will b registerin together wif kun on wed.. haf faith in myself tat i can make it! kees.. durin wkends can kapo daddy's car le! weee!!!

wow.. logged in to my frenster acc.. so overwhelmed.. got flooded by all my colleagues.. lolx~

in Gv, the onli manager i like is ah ma.. yup.. the ONLY one.. she's jus so nice.. i wasnt aware tat i'm suppose to work ytd.. i sent liang to work, she saw mi n said 'hi'.. she tot i was early for work hence she jus walked into the office.. but.. haas.. i left.. she den msg mi to ask if i noe i'm workin at 7pm.. bla bla bla.. nah.. cut the story short, i din turn up.. wanted to head back, but she said its ok.. she din wan mi to rush down jus to work for a few hrs.. she wasnt angry.. wasnt beri particular abt it.. if it's bernard, fion or jes, i tink ytd was oreli my death anniversary.. .. she super understandin.. .. *luv luv* ah ma~ aniwae.. for u guys info.. i call her ah ma bciz the whole Gv calls her so.. haas.. i oso dono y.. but she's pretty n young.. 22 dis yr, onli 3 yrs older den mi n she's gettin married by e end of dis mth or the beginin of nxt mth~ congrats ah ma!

Ytd sandy asked 'actuli.. u like sumone rite..'.. so funi of her.. the funi part is not abt her askin, is abt her oreli knew hu the person is.. n the fact was.. i told her long long time ago.. lolx~ nah.. mayb.. not he case animore.. haas.. 1 yr plus, yet we're still gd frenz.. so.. for the rest of our life, we will still remain as gd frenz.. yup.. i'll tok abt it aft 21.. ..

lolx~ cheng yee saw mi online so xcited.. haas.. everitime chat wif her is like a non stop suan'in session.. so funi.. hahaha..~

k la.. sianz.. nth much to blog oso le.. today off day.. but havin tuition.. goto go prepare n gg out soon le..

Written @ 12:57 PM

dear tank

请不要忘了最初的梦想

这世界充满太多假象

你看到的和真实往往不一样

dear tank

请相信天赋温柔的阳光

会守护爱你的每个人

也守护你心中的天堂

Written @ 10:30 AM

Am at home now.. Weird? Where will i b at dis hrs everi sat? In church.. .. Yes.. In church.. ..

After readin certain blog entry, i've realised hw blissed will tat b to haf a gd frenz tat understands n shares wif u.. *smile* i'm hapi for those tat found theirs, while for mi, i'm still searchin.. erm.. sori.. there's a correction; i'm still waitin.. ..

Most of my closest friendship r built in church.. which oso means i'm takin it at a risk.. .. i'll lose my frenz either wen dey leave church, or i do.. .. i've tried it twice.. .. n guess the third time will b cumin soon.. ..

I hold Bro, Liang n Lin dearest to me.. but sumhw i've discovered a simple revelation, that tat aint MINE aft all.. perhaps in the past, i held dem too tight tat dey cant even breathe, not nw animore.. i nid to understand tat dey haf their own life to live n own world to mingle.. .. its time to let go.. .. i've goto breathe as well.. ..

i don enjoy puttin up a face n givin attitude.. but tats the nature of mi.. i don enjoy actin cool, but it flows naturally.. i don enjoy bein alone, but most of the time, i haf to.. i don enjoy not gg to church, but i haf no choice.. i don enjoy frenz leavin mi, but it happens all the time.. i don enjoy not feelin God, but i sense Him no more.. .. all n all, i din choose to b dis.. .. its nv a tin as easy as pressin a 'Yes' or a 'No' button.. how i wish tats the case but its not.. .. its not.. can sumbody remind mi tat.. ..?

i'm tired of workin hrs aft hrs everiday.. but tats the onli way to allow time to pass.. usin work to numb oneself is reli an effective way.. i don nid money.. y shld i nid so much? whether i work anot doesnt make a diff.. pocket money will still cums in.. .. i jus wan to kill time.. let myself wonder in the 'nobody's dimension'.. .. i complain no more, as its sumtin i goto face den to grumble abt..

I've finally realised tat i've contributed too much time n effect on frenz n neglected myself.. bcuz of frenz, i can even lose oneself.. ..

Don look at me wif the angle of a backslidin person.. try to look at me wif the angle of sumone who is still workin hard, clingin onto the cliff n unwillin to let go, will u guys b.. ..?

i'm tokin lesser n lesser each day in church n durin work.. .. wen will the day b here of mi not speakin a single word at all.. .. i'm thxful to ze ju, eugene n jie ping for listenin to me.. .. ah ma too.. she oways got me tamed.. .. the least i noe is tat dey're willin to listen.. ..

i've had enuf said.. .. i'm tired.. .. wen eva a person is tired, dey shld oways take a break n a well rest.. .. i'm doin it nw.. ..

Written @ 5:03 AM

Changed a new fone as my N72 threw certain attitude on mi.. .. Those K880i, K550i n K600i was my desire fone, ultimately, the shop i went to din haf ani of dem, while new set cost a bomb.. reli a BOMB.. i was den left wif K800i.. was still fine wif holdinm tat fone wen suddenly i rem tat lin, yong xin, sharon, wind, bla bla bla, everione was holdin on to tat model! cannot.. i cannot lose my sense of uniqueness.. n so.. i got a nokia new model! er.. wat model i oso dono.. hahahaha!

i'm so tired can.. haiz.. din fulfill my buildin fund.. was all passionate at the beri first place.. but in the end i was askin myself.. 'Why gif?'.. We gif out of luv.. yes.. we do.. my since the luv aint there oreli, den.. why gif?

both Si min n Mei yun went for operation on the same day.. wanted so much to visit dem but i reli cannot afford to fork out ani time.. i'm like workin long long hrs everiday.. sianz.. super tired.. but not worn out yet.. yup.. there's still more for mi to strive on!

it was rather an upset day for mi.. everione told mi tat JJ wldnt b cumin for the gala premiere of 'Legend of the sea', hu noes.. .. JJ came.. i missed tat chance.. .. i wldnt mind if i'm workin as ushers tat day, but sad to say, i was at candy bar which is at the diff level of where JJ was.. .. How sad i was.. .. so down so down.. thx God, last min dey're like short of ushers, i was called up to b of certain help.. yes.. jus for tat 10 to 15 mins, the desire of my heart is bein fulfilled.. JJ walked passed me.. so close.. he came out of Gold class n was proceedin to the stage at the foyer.. ahhh..~ i was satisfied.. reli.. i was.. .. such encounter, once will b much more den enuf.. ..

workin in GV nids courage n strength.. there're reli alot of challenges for mi to face.. times n again, i felt so discourage.. i almost drop tears but ulitmately din.. .. be STRONG! i can n i will!!!

goto go work soon le.. haiz.. but life's still gd la aft all.. ..

anione got UMD? can lend mi?

Written @ 7:31 AM

Finally emerge had ended.. All the queuein had come to an end.. ..

Here are some of my thoughts throughtout the entire event.. ..

Cell members:
I can say i had a bunch of willing members in my cell, everione was tryin to wake up early to queue inorder to grab the best seats.. i got irritated at times, all about their irresponsibilities.. but aft all, dey had done a gd job by standin in btwn the gap n availin demselves wen is nided.. around of aplus for u guys!

Cell grp leader:
These 4 days, i had seen the worse side of bro, as well as the luvin side of him.. i wonder if he meant everi word of wat he said.. but jus i trusted him.. its oways e fatherly side of him tat warmth n touches my heart..

Pastor Kong:
A kind of breakthru of his hairstyle.. totally amazed.. He's jus so cool.. not handsome i can say, but is the kind of charisma tat makes everione fell for his charm.. he tends to build up surprises for the church, i oways wonder hw did he managed to invite all the singers n celebraties to our church.. *scratch head* he jus noes the heart of youth.. City Harvest Church will nv b famous without a pastor like him, one tat changes nation n raise up a new genaration of youth tat break forth into the world to penatrate thru the society for Christ. Pastor Kong, u rock!

Church:
A church tat is jus so diff.. their kind of passion n fire for God r unmeasureable.. the cheers, the claps, voices of rejoicement.. man.. all theses r music to my ears.. who wld like to queue? no one i guess.. yet all of us got up so early even before the sun had rose, hungry n sweat, all bcuz of one reason.. .. Our luv for God.. n tat procreated the diff of City Harvest.

Wristband:
Erm.. well.. i hope the church can come out wif sumtin beta nxt yr.. i look idiotic n dumb wif the wristband n bangle on.. =.="

Ministry:
Chrousboard made ALOT of mistakes since the first day of emerge.. i was actuli rather upset of me not bein able to serve for emerge, but nw, i felt the 'thx God i'm not servin!' feelin.. haha.. nope nope.. don b discourage yea? u guys still did well i can say! a little mistakes here can there cannot b prevented, hence, jus learn frm our lesson n do even beta for nxt event! with all the video announcements, the diff languages of lyrics, the fotos n pictures, i guess u guys r havin a bz time in the room.. lolx~ i'm proud of u guys! kip it up n i'll join u guys soon in servin big events!!!

Revelation:
I din reli noe hw to manage my money in the past, spendin as thou there's no tml.. but nw i do.. n am a beri niao n thrifty person nw.. Family issue was one of the major obstacle n blockage in my spiritual growth, but nw.. my dad is back wif us.. family bondin is closer n closer.. i used to pinned for all sort of tins, but guess wat? i had all tins tat i wan n is of no lack.. these r jus a small portion.. but why do i touch on all these..? i had a recordin of pastor kong's sermon tat says 'don forget wat the Lord had done, don forget wat he had given to u.. some ppl prayed hard for dis n that, n aft God had given to dem, all of a suddenly, dey disappear in church.. ..' God had given all tat i wan.. but hw did i treat Him back.. ..? but sumtin i'm beri sure of, is tat my heart aint wif Him animore.. reflect Esther.. ..

bought psp! man.. i was all indulged in it.. too addicted to my lego star wars game.. haha! sounded childish isnt it? but liang like tat game too! both of us r crackin our brain cells, work hand in hand to pass thru all the stages! muhahaha! guys, if u haf diff UMD, plz lend mi.. i'm willin to try all sorts of games!

will b gg back to for work today.. kind of reluctant n lazy aft restin for 4 days.. lolx~ workin candy bar ltr.. aww.. SIANZ~ well.. alot ppl hate washin popper.. erm.. m i frm mars or venus? haas.. i luv washin it.. popper, here i come!

k la.. i'll end here.. kees.. tryin to download liu gen hong's 'jia nan mei di' n 'xin fu de ju li'.. muhahaha!!! shhh~ illegal download.. LOL!~